The idea of purpose has been on my mind a lot lately.
For me, the suggestion that we’re each born with one singular, unique purpose – the way it’s typically framed – feels a bit individualistic, maybe even self-indulgent.
Still, it’s obvious that most of us are guided by some kind of deeper drive, whether we realise it or not. It seeps out in the things we’re drawn to: our work, our desire to care for children or animals, to create things, to lead people or projects, to learn new skills. These parts of our lives offer clues. They hint at something bigger.
So maybe purpose isn’t entirely personal or even unique – but more like a collection of shared desires that we each express in different ways.
Understanding the roles we gravitate toward – caregiver, builder, teacher, entertainer, mentor – can offer insight into our own purpose. It can also help free us from tying our identity too tightly to the roles themselves. We often make the mistake of seeing our job title, our role as a parent (especially for mothers), or even our relationship status as all that we are. And while those roles matter, they don’t define you.
You are not your job. You are not just a parent.
There are, however, aspects of those roles that potentially do define you.
Your job can be a vehicle for your purpose.
And your purpose is part of your identity.
The same goes for goals. The goals we chase are often expressions of our purpose – even if we don’t consciously realise it.
Exploring Purpose
Sometimes, we don’t need to go on a deep spiritual journey – we just need to pay attention. What excites us when we’re doing it? What frustrates us when it’s missing? What roles do we naturally slip into without even trying?
And it’s also a really useful way to tell the difference between the roles we naturally step into – and the ones that have been put on us.
Some roles feel right because they align with who we are. Others drain us because they’re based on expectation or obligation. The more we can notice that, the easier it becomes to focus on what actually matters to us.
To help you uncover your purpose – or purposes – I’ve put together a list of broad, recurring patterns that show up across various cultures, psychology, and philosophy. I’ve also created a worksheet with some reflective questions to help you dive deeper still. Most people find themselves connecting with two or three. These aren’t rigid boxes – they’re simply prompts to help you notice the ways your purpose may already be trying to express itself.
Core Purpose
To Care / Serve Others
– Parenting or caregiving
– Teaching, healing, mentoring
– Making a difference in others’ lives
– Community building or activism
To Create / Express
– Art, writing, design, music, invention
– Entrepreneurship or building something meaningful
– Telling stories or shaping ideas
To Grow / Master
– Learning, personal development, self-actualisation
– Challenging oneself or exploring potential
– Mastery in a craft, sport, or discipline
To Belong / Connect
– Building meaningful relationships
– Supporting family or friends
– Being part of something larger than oneself (faith, culture, team)
To Lead / Influence
– Driving change, leading movements, or guiding others
– Visionary or strategic thinking
– Shaping systems, businesses, or culture
To Experience / Explore
– Seeking beauty, novelty, or adventure
– Travel, nature, food, or sensory experiences
– Living fully or embracing presence
To Protect / Defend
– Standing up for justice
– Safeguarding loved ones or values
– Environmental or animal advocacy
To Perform / Entertain
– Bringing joy, energy, or inspiration to others through performance
– Acting, comedy, music, sports, or live storytelling
– Captivating or uplifting an audience through presence and expression
To Transcend / Make Meaning
– Spiritual practice, religion, or philosophy
– Seeking wisdom, enlightenment, or inner peace
– Finding meaning beyond the material
Recognising Purpose in Daily Life
If you’re feeling disconnected or unfulfilled in life, it might not be because you don’t have a purpose – but because you’re not fully aware of it, have lost sight of it, or don’t get the chance to express it in a meaningful way.
Sometimes the opportunities to live our purpose are right in front of us – but limited by time, daily pressures, or systems that make it harder to do what we care about.
Let’s say you feel very driven by a desire to care for others. You work in healthcare, caring for patients. You’re also a parent. Both roles reflect that drive to serve and support. But what happens when the system you work in makes it hard to actually help people the way you want to? What happens when the burnout this causes at work follows you home?
You might still be living in roles that align with your purpose – but the environment makes it hard to express that purpose in a way that feels fulfilling. That tension can leave you feeling stuck, frustrated, or even resentful.
Reclaiming a Sense of Purpose
So how do you begin to shift that?
Start by separating the role from the environment. The role itself might be aligned with your purpose – but if the constraints of the system around it are making it hard to live that out, you don’t necessarily have to abandon the role entirely. Instead, look for ways to reclaim even a small part of your purpose within it.
That might mean setting better boundaries – around your time, your energy, or what gets scheduled into your diary. It might mean shifting your expectations, recognising that you’re doing your best in the circumstances, and focusing on the parts of the work that still feel meaningful to you – even if they’re small.
And if that’s not possible, it may be time to explore other options – places, people, or opportunities – that offer greater freedom to express your purpose.
Balancing Purpose and Livelihood
We often use money as a way to justify staying stuck.
Yes – money matters. It’s a very real thing. We all need to meet our basic needs, and more than that, we deserve comfort and stability when we work hard. So it would be ignorant to say “just quit your job and follow your purpose.” That’s often not practical or even possible.
But it might not always be about quitting.
It might be about looking for glimmers of hope in whatyou already have.
It might not always be easy, but I believe it’s possible to find ways to earn a living without losing sight of what matters to you.
Plenty of people make good money and feel empty. Others live more modestly but feel deeply fulfilled. The goal isn’t to choose between purpose or stability – it’s to find places where the two can overlap.
And when you start living in alignment with your purpose – even in small ways – things often begin to shift. Not overnight, but over time. You feel more yourself. And from that place, change becomes more possible.
Final Thought
You don’t have to chase some grand, elusive purpose.
But you can start paying attention to what already drives you.
Your purpose likely isn’t a title or a job. It’s the parts of those roles that speak to you – caring, creating, leading – the impact you leave through how you treat people and how you act in your day-to-day life.
Begin there.
And trust that small expressions of purpose – done consistently – can shape a deeply meaningful life.